Tuesday, January 31, 2006

Huffy........still a little fat kid from Springdale

I noticed today that Mr Chuck Huff made it to

Nice picture. Makes you look real PRO!

Nice bio. Even more PRO!
Country: USA
Previous team: Mercy Cycling Team
DOB: 02/05/79
Hometown: Fairgrove, MO
Residence: Springfield, MO
Height: 5'10"/177 cm
Weight: 175 lbs/79 kg
Strengths: Sprinting, track
Pro since: 2006
Hobbies: Cooking, drinking coffee

I am a little disappointed that you didn't list "Waxing Doug Greek's Ass" as a hobby. By Waxing I mean waxing not dropping. What about cheerleading? Don't forget your roots.

I am totally getting a shirt that says "Pro since: 2006" Ok mine well say something like "Pro since: NEVER". But you get the point.

Make us proud Huff.

Monday, January 30, 2006

Pound on This (Short and Choppy Version)

So to recap this last weekend's rides.
It rained. I rode in the rain. I got wet from the rain. I drank 2 beers and was trashed. It is not bad riding in the rain. It is better than setting on a trainer.

It didn't rain. It was windy out of the west. We went fast in the tail wind. There was silent crying and bitching (my personal favorite kind of bitching and moaning). The group shrunk. I had a king sized candy bar in Mokane. We rode back in a head wind for 3 hrs. I then ate so much food my belly stuck out. I drank 1 beer and then passed out at 9:27pm last night.

Bubba and I went for our morning walk. Bubba took a big shit in my neighbor's (Big Angry) yard. It was a large pile of shit that I am sure Big Angry will step in.

A few points to be made:
1)Yes, I will burnout in 4 months. Just like every year I burnout and disappear and stop racing by May.
2)I am actually 4 times as angry as I appear
3)Removed...........because Jimmiez and "The Ball and Chain" said so.
4)Yes, it is my goal in life to make people feel bad about themselves
5)I do "core workouts" daily but for some reason all the fat still goes to my ankles.

Is it CX season yet?

Friday, January 27, 2006


So to top off the best week ever while drinking a coke yesterday I realized I had won a free one! I was so pumped I gave the winning cap to one of my coworkers. He is by far the cheapest person I know.....even cheaper than the Tr-olly. Needless to say my coworker is also having the best week ever!

Anyways more random base blogging......
So Dr ProPam Hinton sent me this article about how boobies' sizes are inversely proportional to VO2 Max. It was an interesting article and made me think about a few on my lonely ride in the dark last night down by the river I had a revelation! Ok maybe not a revelation but a thought none the less. Fish and Beefcakes both have man boobies. Granted Fish has fatty man boobies while Beefcakes has muscle man boobies but they both have man boobies. I wonder if they lost their man boobies would their VO2 Max Numbers improve? And what about fake boobies?

In other news: I attempted to do a "core workout" yesterday but then I realized I could just eat a king sized candy bar instead....

Thursday, January 26, 2006


Alright so normally I am not this cheery but WTF!
So here is my week recapped so far
1)Sunday- broke legs for about 5hrs
2)Monday- Bubba's leg is good to go again so no blue bottles are safe
3)Tuesday- Pair of Oakleys show up from Thanks Dan
4)Wednesday- Got 3.5 hrs in riding in the dark with Jimmiez and Fish. I got to hear stories of greatness.....
5)Thursday- The new coffee at work showed that I requested.

I mean really can this get any better? With any luck tomorrow for lunch I will get to try the new Hooters.

Even better it is suppose to rain saturday and sunday. That is great! 5hrs in the rain riding around in tight paints! Think of the crying and bitching! Legs will be broken.

Monday, January 23, 2006

5 days until more leg breaking

So I have adapted a new thought in my training. That thought is....."do what I want to do". No more going slow because somebody is tired. No more cutting a ride short because somebody needs be home. I got 1 rule when it comes to training now and that is I am doing what I want to fucking do.

Everyone in BOCOMO should go on notice. If you show up on Saturday or Sunday for the noon ride leave all the complaining at home. I will make it a point to break everyone's legs everytime somebody bitches about the route or the pace. In my mind silence is golden.

Anyways the rides this last weekend were great people showed up and got dropped, people complained and got dropped, and in general legs were broken.

Save all your burnout talk / christmas star shit for somebody who cares. My goal this season is to burnout or blow up.

In other news: Nolan Froese you are #1 on the drop list come Saturday.

I hate fucking dumbass juniors.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Base Blogging Continues....

Only 2 dollars! That seems like a great deal.

Looks like at least one Hill has been training.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

I got my wish

So yesterday as I headed out on my "secert training ride" like I do every day it was about 32 degrees.........when I got home it seemed like it was 2 fucking degrees. When I rode to work this morning it was 15 degrees. My legs actually got cold for once.......I guess I will have to wear more than leg warmers next time.

Long story short. Work has been a bit boring today so my mind has done some searching. Maybe searching is not the right word but I am working with a limited vocabulary here so it will have to do.

Kind of makes riding in the cold a little more worth while...

That was a good day. Poor Zack he looks really tired.

Everybody starts somewhere..

Little buddy is responsible for the jersey design

Does the words "Land Grant Institution" mean anything to anyone?

Thanks Gov Blunt! Do you want to come over to my house and take a shit in the front yard?

Oh and the Tigers(Land Grant Institute) beat KU(Land Grant Institute). You know it really sucks being a fan. I know my heart will be broken come saturday when we play KSU (Land Grant Institute).

I am totally addicted to blogs. I used to love message boards but now it is blogs. I love it! I read all these blogs of all these people training routines and everything else and it is just fucking great. I think I am going to cancel the satellite and just read blogs from now on.

Oh, I have been working on my basement a ton. It is just great. I get a image in my head of what I want to build and...........3 yrs and $10K later it is done. Sometimes I wish I could drop the Internet Software gig and just build things. Man that would just kick ass.

In other news: Bubba is still alive.

Monday, January 16, 2006

Columbia IL sucks

If anyone is ever looking for an endless head wind with no corners or hills go to Columbia IL and ride south.

Put that on my list of things I won't do again.

From this point on all my "training rides" will stay in BOCOMO. You don't realize how good you have it until you go some where that isn't so good. So don't call me, email me, or telegraph me to come to your little town to ride. Last time I checked I get X amount of time to ride my bike and that is going to be spent doing rides in BOCOMO. Of course if I win the lottery and can rid myself of all reponsiblities I would "Winter" in the Hill Country of Texas.........but that is not fucking happening so that is that.

What the fuck is up with this weather. If this 50 degree shit keeps up all of the fuck heads who hide from the cold all winter might actually be in shape this year. I for one hope the bottom falls out and we have a month straight of high of 31 degrees. There is nothing worse in my mind than a fair weather cyclist. Go Lance!

Friday, January 06, 2006

Big Angry Needs a CX bike fund

That is right. My biggest fan needs a cx bike. I am starting a fund so all you dumbasses send me some money. Feather has been my biggest support for years and he needs money for a bike. So buck as an added bonus all who give will get 10 minutes with Feather's fence with the hole in it. Remeber to bring 2 "maters" with you.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Alright let us start base blogging!

So I was reading on today and I must admit the STL awards are just gay. (No offense Huff)

So the way I see it I need to have my own fucking gay awards for the great year of 2005.

So I will start my list. I ain't taking votes so just shut the fuck up
1)Best crash of the year..That goes to Tracy. The mother fucker scared all of Columbia with his head slapping time. Fuck I even wear my helmet now.
2)Most Excuses for poor performances.......Fuck I can think of a shit load of people who would fight that one out. If you think you made this list, you need to wake up!
3)The "No Skills" award would got to Guppy.....He is one shitty little fish
4)Biggest Fat Ass would go to ......Fish. That guy is fat but I do have to say that Cueball's back side is starting to look like a Mack Truck
5)Biggest Pussy.......fuck just put everyone's name under there.
6)Rider most likely to get dropped on a noon ride......fuck put everyone's name here also

My list is just going to shit at this point so I will just stop for today. I will continue with my list once the voices in my head slow down a bit. I will take suggestions but most likely I will just ignore them.

Tuesday, January 03, 2006

2 week break

In an effort to get the most out of my blogging I am taking 2 weeks off. After the break I will begin my base blogging activities. So you can look forward to lots of long entries with lots of complaining. Of course if it is raining or below 50 degrees I will probably just skip that day's entry.