Jimmiez Recap of CX Nats....

CX Nats Recap

A bunch of guys started


A bunch of guys decided to crash 50 yards later

Fucking Fucked

I am totally smoked from this last weekend. Tony of LBC has the craziest dismout I have ever seen and he does it without problems everytime. Nothing like getting your ass kicked by a guy on a fix geared CX bike. I think Tony is actually faster on the fix gear than a normal bike. He had gears at the first round of Mid West cross cup but was not near as quick as has been the last 2 weekends. The real question is where in the hell do you come up with the idea that a fix geared CX bike would be what you would race? It was impressive and he is strong as hell right now.

Lots of rest this week and then I am off to Rhode Island on Wednesday. Should be a fun road trip with Jimmiez. I plan on taking my camera and will try and take notes on the countless Jimmiez stories.

Hey Bill Marshall what was up with the call ups on Sunday? How does Fatboy Froese get a call to the line and I don't?

Speaking of starts........has anyone seen mine? I seem to have lost it some where in the month of October. Maybe NEXT YEAR I will find it.

"Dude - eat drink and be merry for tomorrow we die! Choose your weapon wisely dude!"


For the record. I am no Brad Huff. GO TEAM!

Fucking Work

Is it saturday yet? Today is going to fucking suck and there is no getting around it. In other news UCI CX in KC tomorrow.

Some other things...
1) It is Cankles not Kankles (Really if this is to be what I am called at least refer to it correctly)
2) It is fucking cold in MO right now. I actually rode inside last night. That is not a good sign of things to come.
3) Bubba is still alive

My Boy Blue.

http://secondchurchofgravity.blogspot.com/

A Cankle here........run over a Fat Man there

So rolled out my new "Cankle Specific" Socks yesterday. I thought they made my cankles a little less distracting

(bobber took all these photos. thanks)

I ran over the Fat Man. The Fat Man makes one hell of a speed bump. I could smell burning rubber and flesh.

Looks like his CDale shorts were not cankle proof (WARRANTY!)

The Jewish White Cracker and Frosted Flakes thought a big rubber snake would be real funny.

I am scared of snakes. There is a story behind it but in order to tell it I need to be drunk or willing to cry or both and right now I am not ready to go there.

Is Jelly Roll Hill ever going to race CX again?

Fucking Friday Already

So this kicks some ass Soap Box Derby
Jelly Roll and I are totally entering this. With any luck I will bring my brother's engineering skills to building my Derby car. I mean really this kicks ASS!

In other news..........I am still a bit fucked from the last 2 weekends of stupidity
1)my leg is still fucked
2)my hip is still fucked
3)my shoulder is still fucked

However my handlebars and stem are no longer fucked from my little trip to the ground on Sunday.

Anyways if I understand RP correctly he is done for the year. Well that just fucking sucks........

And what the fuck is up with this weather? It was 12 degrees out when I rode to work yesterday. That is just to fucking cold for november.

I feel the anger building so this weekend should be fun.

Sheet Cake, not just for breakfast anymore

So it is friday and I am totally tired at this point. My shin is still swelled up from bunny hopping barriers on my face and my shoulder is still killing me. Nothing like being a jackass and fucking yourself up but that would be 100% my fault.

In other news............Bubba is still alive.

The gravel grumble is tomorrow. Looks to be a large time. I have centered my entire fall training around going fast tomorrow so look for me to be in top form.....

Let see pictures??? I know I have something...

This Little Guy is not sick anymore and will be returning to racing sunday. I would imagine sunday will be one hell of a battle.

oh god!

"I'll watch the highlights every now and then, but as far as watching the game, I feel like I am the game."
-- Owens to SI.com, October, 2004

WTF

Another photo from one of my fans.


I am not really sure what to make of this. His email said something about cheerleading or cheering or something. All I know is that George needs to get a job because anyone who thinks dressing up like the Blind Melon girl is cool.......well they are on crack. I won't even go into the "hey take a photo of me I will send it to Johnson" part.

Friends don't let Friends dress like the Blind Melon girl.

My fans are everywhere!!

So it appears one of my fans snapped a photo of me doing some training on Mars.

Thanks Klages

This guy sent me a photo of himself trying suggest he had found better glasses than the "Captain Crunch" Model

I think I will be staying with the "Crunchers"

The Butthead Fan Club.

Oh this is just great! Here it is another day at work and I find out I have a fan club. So if I have a fan club we need to get somethings straight. We needs rules, t=shirts, and free stuff.

First the rules. Only one rule will need to be followed. That is rule #1. No other rules are needed.

T-shirts: That is where the famous "#2" aka Johnny Merli comes in. #2 take this photo and put an "X" on Ace Pirtle's head and make some t-shirts. Shut up #2! You know the rules. Just do it.

Free Suff! Just go down to Big Shark. Ask for Mike and tell him you are member of the Butthead Fan Club. Free stuff will follow.

These guys
are in charge of all kankle polishing duties.

Plus everyone must wear Captain Crunch glass like below.

Well this just sucks

No more beer tents in Cyclo-cross
The UCI has banned cyclo-cross races from passing through beer tents, one of the hallowed traditions in many Belgian events. The decision was made on the grounds that it was unsafe, on the basis of remarks made by Richard Groenendaal last year about the difference in inside/outside temperatures and the danger of being hit by beer glasses. However, Groenendaal said that his comments were not intended to be taken that way.

This is kind of funny

Failure at Google Look at the first link.


By the way RP still sucks at Cross

FUCK YEAH!!

So finally after months of reading http://jpows.com he finally gives me the call out I have been waiting for! Read it HERE

Now if Tilford only had a blog............

WHATEVER DUDE!

"THE BUBBA" CX is about here...........

So here is what I have heard about this year....

Jewfusses has put on a few pounds.


Jimmiez will be throwing down once again.


According to Luke......TK is going big this year (not just his hair)


Of Course Ace and Gary Pirtle will be in full on gay mode (Ryan is the one on the bottom)


Jelly Roll Hill will be motor pacing me to all of the races behind his new bike



I was going to post a pic of Fish but I hate that guy and he not worth the time.

The Bubba is famous

Cyclocrossworld.com

The Article


This is just fucking great. Now the entire world knows I have an over weight dog that looks like a fucking Hog. I sure have some hate building. To make things worse this is going to go straight to The Bubba's head.....fuck he already takes my place on the couch. What next?

In other news.....Ethan "Fatman" Froese will be doing his first CX race of the season. I think the game known as "Lap a Dude" will be transformed into "Lap a Fat Old Man who looks like a Monkey".........

Here is a prerace quote from the Fatman. "Fuck Butthead. I hate that guy. He is such a fucking dick....he thinks he is so elite. Fuck Him"

Des Moines...........aka The Midwest Turd

So I traveled up to Des Moines Iowa this weekend. If you grew up in Missouri you would say that something like DA Moinesssssss. Anyways I stayed with http://www.jj-bailey.com/. http://www.jj-bailey.com/ has everything you can imagine.......speaking of that I fucked up his 42inch HD wide screen tv. It was way to much TV for me to handle.

Anyways here are some photos

This is Ralph.........and that is the "Coffee Bus" in the back ground

The "Coffee Bus" is the greatest thing since.....Chucky Huff gave up cheerleading

Here is the run up from the race. I am totally getting my ass kicked. CX is for pussies!



Oh shit how did that get into this entry....

Anyways here is the link to the races I attended in DA Moinesssss
http://www.midamericacrosscup.com

In other news my Scooter has a flat tire so no motor pacing for me. That fucking pisses me off!

YOU ARE MY BOY BLUE!!!!!!

AAHHHHHH a good day for a scooter ride around campus.




Dropped.........


No you can't come along don't ask.

Fucking Road Season is DONE!

So I stayed with Jelly Roll and The Coach this last weekend. They have some sort of rat or small varmet that runs around the house.

Such a cute little guy

Then I went and practiced on the Velodrome.......

(great trick photography.......I should change jobs)


Then last night while shopping I noticed something.

In Columbia "Large" was the only option. So Huffy what does a little guy like you do? Is it like that in Springdale?

WTF IS WRONG WITH HUFF?

Where are the stars n bars?

And Huff wonders why Jelly Roll and I make fun of him so much

LITTLE GUY WINS AND PUKES

aaaahhhhh are you ok?


God that is gross! (Sorry the lighting was bad. If you look close you can see a little pile) What you cann't see in the pic is that Little Buddy had beans and rice before the race.

If that is what it takes to beat "The Evil Steve Tilford". I think I would use the force "The Evil Steve Tilford" in the curb and jam on my breaks technique.


I guess Luke has family in Warrensburg, Mo.....or at least his Family Crest is all over the place down there

FUCK ALL OF THIS SHIT

So since I suck and always will suck I have decide to become a Pro Dog Trainer. Here are some of my photos from training with "the Bubba".


Notice I am working with a state champion


Normally "the Bubba" is not one to wear the colors but you know........


Notice the concentration.........the focus


"the Bubba" wants to wear a national jersey but for some reason he hasn't got one yet


In 20 years some asshole is going to say "Who the fuck is Butthead?" Little does that asshole know what he is missing out on.